Thursday, April 06, 2006

Picking up the Pieces

What the hell is with this whole Picking up the Pieces? Easy answer with a kinda-but-not-really long background.

Years and years ago, I had a nickname that a boyfriend, at the time, gave me. It stuck like glue and even to this day I use it as the heading on my cell phone or sometimes I use it for user IDs. Nearly everyone I know (with the exception of family and co-workers), knows me by the nickname. It is appealing, intriguing and downright dirty. I would have used that nickname for this site, but here’s the thing… I do not want any of J’s friends finding the site. I have no problems with any ex-boyfriends finding this site and so forth, but honestly… J’s friends… we won’t even get into that topic. So I moved from one online home to another but it always seemed like I had to censor myself because unwanted reading eyes were following me. It also would explain why I no longer use real names in my posts, but rather, I use abbreviations or use a name that is similar. I hated having to censor what I was really feeling and thinking… fuck that, eh? What would be the point.

I could have easily said screw it and not bother creating another online site, but I thoroughly enjoy reading the stories that I come across, as well as I do enjoy sharing mine. The best reason that I have for writing these stories is not only for entertainment purposes, but because I take pleasure in looking back at the things that I have done, thought or seen. All of these tales remind of accomplishments or mistakes that I hope I can learn from, not to mention all the endearing memories I have of certain people throughout my life. Never in a million years would I ever want to forget the following: cutting my own hair… twice; the numerous dumpsters/alleys/etc. around Calgary that have been marked with the signature AJ Urine Territory (I’m classy, I know – I was drunk); my friendships with Jamie, Cammy, Char, Derek, Whitey, etc.; and my absolute favourite… the list of boyfriends I’ve been with.

For me, it’s all about picking up the pieces of my past, learning from them and taking these memories with me without falling flat on my face into a pile of shit and becoming a dumbass who repeats her mistakes (except for the AJ Urine Territory thing because if you were as drunk as I were, all those times, with no toilet in sight but a rolling hill covered in trees and only Jamie as your look out, you would have done the same).

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